If I could just find Napoleon, he'd get me out of this mess.
Once again I am forced to seek help. I would greatly appreciate it if someone viewing this page would contact my partner, Napoleon Solo or Mr. Alexander Waverly. If that is not possible, please alert the following organizations immediately: The Concerned Citizens for the Preservation of Pouting Action Figures (CCPPAF) or The Society for the Protection of Cute Kuryakins (S.P.O.C.K.)
Can't I even go outside for my newspaper without all of you gawking at me?